My mum just came into my room and said “did you lose a pair of pants?”
and I was like “…what”
and then she took my hand
and gave me this carrot
I tried to give it back but she ran away laughing
i dont know if people are checking me out or shocked at how ugly i am
(Source: marinasexual)
have you ever caught someone staring at you and wondered what they’re thinking about like if it’s something positive or negative if it’s a passing thought or a long internal string of things if they’re even thinking about you at all or you just happen to be in the line of sight while their mind drifts off about something completely unrelated
(Source: aquababy)
sometimes my twelve year old little sister will go on club penguin and trick a bunch of girls that she’s a guy and she’ll make them think they’re dating and then she’ll have them all meet her in the same place at the same time and watch them get into catfights about who’s boyfriend she is and thats how my little sister became a cross-dressing evil mastermind pimp on club penguin
(Source: knightpecutie)
guys who get really competitive in gym are so scary like it’s just high school gym why are u soo angry that u lost a game of volleyball
closing a 3-ring binder clasp on your finger
*looks in the mirror*
what the fuck is that
all i do is sit around and eat and be sad im basically a more annoying version of a plant
